Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain...

​ I have a head full of jokes that are locked by keywords. I don’t know what the keywords are, but I’ll stop a conversation and start telling a joke when I hear one.       It’s the way my brain works: triggers and keywords. Today a couple of triggers pulled a memory or two out of cold storage, warmed them up, and set them free.       I built my son a workbench when he was six. Eleven years later, it’s still sitting inside my front door. The first trigger was a paint brush that was tinted yellow by the swing I painted last summer. It’s hanging from a hook on the pegboard.  The second trigger was a picture of an old John Deere tractor I saw in one of those vehicles for sale magazines.       My grandpa had a 1939 John Deere. In his garage there was a shelf above the ladder rack. It was packed with stuff. I have that in common with my grandpa. I have stuff, too. I haven’t found a use for much of the stuff, but I keep telling m...

     ​ I bumped into a man stocking shelves in a local store in a nearby town. He apologized for having to turn his wheelchair around in front of me. I told him that I wasn’t in a hurry, and it wasn’t a big deal.         I told him that he was an inspiration. In a time when able bodied people claimed they couldn’t find a job, a man in a wheelchair was working harder than most of today’s young people would want to.         He told me he didn’t want to be an inspiration because of his handicap. He wanted to be an inspiration for his love of God. He was humble because God says that we shouldn’t be prideful. He did what he did because God gave him the strength to carry on each day. His body wasn’t a reflection of him. The Holy Spirit and what filled his head and heart was what made him who he was. He    shared the gospel every chance he got.        He said that he often talked to people that came in th...

​     I’ve noticed a change in myself that I didn’t plan upon.  I’m not as cold blooded as I once thought I was. Some things upset me more than they used to. I can’t watch the news anymore. If I see a story about someone hurting a child or a woman, I come unhinged.       I’m glad that the legal system works the way it does. I’d be a vigilante if this were the old west.  I’d travel from one town to the next with a noose tied to my saddle looking for people that hurt a child or a woman.      I’m not talking about corporal punishment. A good butt whippin’ kept me on the straight   and narrow more than once. I can remember making choices to avoid one.       What I’m talking about is using a fist or weapon against a woman or child. No one should have to live in fear because of a coward who believes his “punishment” of a family member is necessary.       I talked to a police officer in Indianap...

​         There are some unique things about being from a large family. When I was young, we were very close. My cousins were all big parts of my life. I visited aunts and uncles with my parents and later by myself.        There was always someone to visit and share memories with.        When we started families of our own, we didn’t have as much time for one another as we did before. We still saw each other at grandpa and grandma’s house.  Once grandpa and grandma were gone, we ran into each other less and less.        There’s a funny thing about family that loves one another and drifts apart. The feelings you had when you drifted apart remain. Years may pass, but those feelings remain.        Sometimes, the only time we see our relatives is a funeral. The worst is when the funeral is theirs. You stand with family members and reminisce about the past for a while, then you follow to ...

​ Memories pop into my head when I least expect it. I have thousands of key words that will pull a joke or memory kicking and screaming from the deepest depths of my mind.       My sister, Lisa Sutton Eckelbarger, commented on one of my posts that I don’t write about her. Well, sis, this one is for you.       In 1983, my sister was a big fan of the cartoon series Shirt Tales. The Shirt Tales were talking animal crime fighters. The messages on their shirts changed to reflect their thoughts.       Hardee’s was offering a set of five stuffed shirt tales by selling one a week with a kid’s meal. My mom and dad forced me to eat there every Thursday for five weeks. It was cruel and unusual punishment. I could eat more than that.       When I collected all five, they decided it would be for Christmas. I don’t know where mom hid them, but I told her to let me handle wrapping them. I wrapped a dozen boxes inside of ea...

​      There are moments in television that no one will ever forget. When they finally told us that Kristin Shepard shot JR was a big one. The last episode of M.A.S.H. was another.       We lived for the cliffhanger episodes that were very common in the seventies and eighties. The great revelation was standard practice near the beginning of the next season.       I remember many of these moments, but there are two that I’ll never forget. They were very important to me. I could identify with them.       A big part of my morning routine was the Janie show. Janie Woods Hodge was the star of the show. It was a variety show in which she sang, visited with children, and played cartoons.       Each morning she would show drawings that were sent in by viewers. Why do I remember this so vividly that I can see a white house with green grass, a tree, the sun above it, and a bird in the sky?  The nam...

​         I looked in the mirror this morning and wondered what happened to the young guy that once starred back at me. The guy standing there looking at me resembled him, but he looked like life had beat him up a bit.        How has changed?     Some of his heroes have changed. The man in the mirror still reads a Stephen King novel once in a while, but there are a few books from Mr. King that he’s never read. His interests haven’t changed much. He still enjoys science fiction and fantasy, but now he’ll read action and adventure as well as non-fiction. He still reads the Bible but with a little more understanding of what it means to him now.          Some of the movie heroes he enjoyed have passed away or past their prime. Now, he’ll watch a good mystery, science fiction story, or an interesting documentary. The names of the stars don’t stick in his head like they used to. He knows Harrison Ford, John Wayne,...